A number of years ago, I was in a life situation that felt out of control. I was hanging on by a thread. I took the time and the effort (and the money, which was hard to come by at that time) to see a counselor. We worked together for a while, and things got better, and I slowed down, and it all turned out well.
Okay, that's not much of a story, is it? I'm not going to spill my guts about what was going on, but I thought I would pass along a few things the counselor gave me - life changing habits - that I still use today. If they help you, great; if they don't, maybe they will help someone you know.
1) use more analog clocks. Remember those? He pointed out that '3.57' sounds much more harsh than 'a little before 4'. Plus, you can watch the hands going around. That can be soothing. And, most rooms don't need more than one clock.
2) Have only one calendar in the house; put everything on it. Having a calendar in each bedroom, another in the kitchen, PLUS one on every iphone in the household only means multiple ways of forgetting something.
3) Move 27 things every day. Now, he told me this was originally a Buddhist practice; I dunno. But the thought is that by moving things each day, you can change the energy in a room, stay uncluttered, throw more things away, or find that other remote. (Okay, I made the last one up, but you get the point). And at the end of a day when I have made little or no progress on anything in my life - well, I moved 27 things.
4) Count to 10 before you answer any question. He told me to watch a beauty pageant, and notice how, when the interview segment occurs, the candidate will often repeat the question back to the interviewer. That does a couple of things: it makes sure the question was heard correctly, AND it buys time.
5) Practice saying to yourself, "I am not alone". Believe me, in my worst times, saying that was salvific. It was a wonderful reminder that God's presence was alway with me, felt or unfelt, even wanted or unwanted. It gave me strength, and caused me to try to be at my best. It still does.
Okay, that's not much of a story, is it? I'm not going to spill my guts about what was going on, but I thought I would pass along a few things the counselor gave me - life changing habits - that I still use today. If they help you, great; if they don't, maybe they will help someone you know.
1) use more analog clocks. Remember those? He pointed out that '3.57' sounds much more harsh than 'a little before 4'. Plus, you can watch the hands going around. That can be soothing. And, most rooms don't need more than one clock.
2) Have only one calendar in the house; put everything on it. Having a calendar in each bedroom, another in the kitchen, PLUS one on every iphone in the household only means multiple ways of forgetting something.
3) Move 27 things every day. Now, he told me this was originally a Buddhist practice; I dunno. But the thought is that by moving things each day, you can change the energy in a room, stay uncluttered, throw more things away, or find that other remote. (Okay, I made the last one up, but you get the point). And at the end of a day when I have made little or no progress on anything in my life - well, I moved 27 things.
4) Count to 10 before you answer any question. He told me to watch a beauty pageant, and notice how, when the interview segment occurs, the candidate will often repeat the question back to the interviewer. That does a couple of things: it makes sure the question was heard correctly, AND it buys time.
5) Practice saying to yourself, "I am not alone". Believe me, in my worst times, saying that was salvific. It was a wonderful reminder that God's presence was alway with me, felt or unfelt, even wanted or unwanted. It gave me strength, and caused me to try to be at my best. It still does.
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